Opinion | Elon Musk foolishly asks Twitter users if he should step down as CEO and gets millions of goodbye waves

An idea for Elon Musk’s next Twitter poll: “Did I make a huge mistake?”

“Yes” would be my vote as this poor rich guy continues to run the social media company he acquired in late October like a one-armed juggler with way too many chainsaws twirling in the air above his head. All you can do is wince and look away.

On Sunday, Mr. Musk, whose short tenure as “Chief Twit” has been fraught with more peril than a scooter ride along the Guoliang Tunnel Road, tacitly betrayed his lack of faith in his own capacity to lead.

“Should I step down as head of Twitter?” he asked his 122 million followers.

Granted, his polls are as scientific as a Magic 8 Ball. But after promising to “abide by the results,” Lord Elon of the Twittersphere must be bruised by Monday’s final tally: 57.5 per cent of the 17,502,391 votes cast declared “Yes,” he should go.

Why he wants to stay is the bigger question.

Apple brought out the best in the late Steve Jobs. Twitter is actively killing Musk’s reputation. Walking around in a neon tutu and feather boa would be a better look than owning Twitter. The troll is now unwittingly trolling himself.

With each passing day of chaos and tumult at Twitter, it’s hard to spot a visionary business leader and easy to see a rank hypocrite. Musk would have been better off buying Lululemon and turning it into a soup kitchen that also sells flame-throwers.

He wants to own the libs but keeps owning himself.

After previous polls — including a hasty moratorium on restoring Donald Trump’s account — Musk has used the Latin phrase “vox populi, vox dei” to pretentiously burnish his populist bona fides: “Voice of the people, voice of God.”

A more accurate Latin phrase would be: “Ego sum vox dei.”

I am the voice of God.

Musk claims to be a free speech absolutist. Then he suspends the accounts of journalists who cover him. He claims Twitter is “the digital town square.” Then he acts like an overzealous bouncer in a private night club. He basks in the glow of sycophants and recoils with horror at even the mildest criticism.

His skin is thinner than parchment. His antics are third-grader.

Musk keeps changing Twitter’s terms of service to rationalize his brittle instincts. In a month, do not be surprised if merely suggesting he had a hair transplant triggers an automatic suspension. Pointing out that “Elon Musk” is an anagram for “Sunk Mole” could result in a lifetime shadow ban. As might any trash talk about Tesla or speculation on the challenges his child faces going through life while named “X Æ A-Xii.” Since Musk is a big fan of French cuisine, I would strongly advise against tweeting any anti-escargot jeremiads until he settles down a bit.

That’s assuming he ever settles down a bit.

The only thing Musk has accomplished in the last six weeks of manic and impetuous folly is to prove Twitter is a colossal waste of time — especially his. Can you imagine if Einstein spent hours every day playing with marbles? Or if Leonardo da Vinci occupied his days painting the bottoms of his feet?

That’s what Musk is doing. Instead of tending to his other companies, instead of focusing on electric cars or space exploration, he’s up to his eyes in the terrestrial slop of Twitter, sharing memes and cracking wise and retweeting randos and running more polls than Gallup.

And for what? To justify the truly insane $44 billion (U.S.) he spent on a money-losing enterprise in a hostile takeover that one day will be taught in business school as a cautionary tale along with the AOL-Time Warner merger and New Coke? To impress his libertarian buddies in the podcast ecosystem? To feed his ego?

This might be the most expensive mid-life crisis in history.

And that’s not including the millions Tesla shareholders are dropping on antacids.

When Musk recently suspended the account @elonjet, which used public data to track his private plane, it was his credibility that crashed and burned. He became what he allegedly abhors: a self-serving censor. He had previously said the account was safe because he believed in free speech.

But it seems free speech does not include his itinerary now that he’s boss.

You can’t successfully run a social media company if you are obsessed with also being its biggest power user. There’s a reason 7-Eleven franchise owners don’t loiter in the parking lot eating beef jerky and pounding back Big Gulps. That would not be a wise business strategy. Alas, Musk does not appear to have a coherent plan for “fixing” Twitter. So, instead, he keeps breaking stuff week after week.

He has become more exhausting than a colicky newborn.

Did Elon Musk make a huge mistake buying Twitter? Yes.

Should he step down as CEO? Yes.

Twitter needs a real leader, not a sophomoric ringleader.

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