Nick Cannon has opened up about the ‘guilt’ he feels in the wake of his son’s death, expressing how much therapy has helped him to ‘learn and grow’ in his life.
In December last year, the TV presenter shared the devastating news that his son Zen, who he welcomed with Alyssa Scott in June 2021, had died at five months old after suffering from a rare brain tumour.
Speaking on an episode of his eponymous talk show, the 41-year-old recalled how in the last days of Zen’s life, he ‘made an effort to spend the most quality time’ with him, including taking him to the ocean.
In a new instalment of his TV show, Nick shared footage of himself speaking to his therapist Dr Laura Berman on an episode of her podcast, The Language of Love, introducing the clip by saying: ‘I am a work in progress and therapy has been an important tool in helping learn and grow and navigate through my unconventional personal life.’
During his conversation with Dr Laura, Nick explained that ‘the one thing that keeps me up at night’ is ‘heavy, heavy guilt with the fact that I didn’t get to spend time like I really wanted to with Zen’.
Continuing, he said: ‘That I have other children even in a similar age that I was like, “OK, I’m guilty that I’m not there every day. I’m guilty that the mothers of my children yearn for more and I can only give so much.”’
While Nick said that he ‘walks around with a backpack full of guilt’, he acknowledged that ‘the harder that I work, then it makes the guilt easier to deal with’.
Last month, the comedian shared a heartfelt tribute to his son on Instagram, writing: ‘Still missing my little dude… His Spirit and brightness were soo strong #ZensLight.
‘“To be absent from the body, is to be present with the Lord”. 2Corinthians 5:8 The whole family, We ALL miss you young King! Forever Our Angel! (sic).’
On Valentine’s Day, Alyssa shared the heartbreaking final words that she said to her son, posting a series of photos of Zen wearing a bear onesie.
‘My last words to you were “I’m here, I love you”. That will ring true until the end of time.. I’m here and I love you baby. I’m just missing you extra today. My son. You are all of my dreams realized,’ she wrote.
It recently emerged that Nick is expecting his eighth child with Bre Tiesi, after he was pictured cuddling up to the model at her baby shower.
He later apologised for any hurt he caused with the announcement, saying that he ‘misspoke’ and ‘could have done better’ when talking about the baby news.
The Nick Cannon talk show airs on Fox in the US.
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