I’m an MP and I know how it feels to be lonely… but can you spot the signs?

I KNOW how it feels to be lonely.

I would be a hypocrite if, this National Loneliness Week, I talked about wanting us to tackle the stigma without admitting I’ve gone through it.

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It is my view that every person in this country has experienced varying degrees of loneliness, at some point in their lives.

There are periods in my life that I have felt that way. And that’s what makes me, as Loneliness Minister, passionate about dealing with it.

I was sitting on my own once and a group of people noticed and called me over saying, ‘Come join us’. That made a world of difference.

It’s simple things like that which can be a massive contribution to tackling this, because the government can’t do it alone.

We know from the research we’ve done that loneliness can be a real issue.

There are different reasons why people go through it. Sometimes it depends on where you live, and your own personal experiences.

We know the pandemic was another aggravating factor, while leading academics and clinicians around the world are also recognising loneliness can contribute to poor physical and mental health.

That’s why it’s a key area for us to look at and to try to tackle, because the benefits to the individual would obviously be important, but equally to public services as well. 

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If we tackle it together, we can help people live healthier, longer lives.

World first 

We were the first country in the world to appoint a loneliness minister, and our government has a loneliness strategy.

We are now seeing the issue rise up the political agenda.

But the biggest challenge that remains is people acknowledging and admitting that they’re lonely.

A decade ago people wouldn’t talk about their mental health, but now thankfully, they are feeling more comfortable to do so.

And that’s the point I think we’re currently at with regard to loneliness – it’s about breaking down those barriers surrounding stigma.

I was sitting on my own once and a group of people noticing, called me over saying, ‘Come join us’ and that made a world of difference.

Stuart Andrew

There are a number of ways you can tell someone is lonely.

On our streets, for example, who may live alone? Do we check on them? Do we just see how they’re doing and invite them around for coffee?

Maybe sometimes when you see people sitting on their own, you can acknowledge them and say ‘hello’.

Soon, they will reach out and you can tell they will want to talk.

It’s about being aware of the people around you. And let’s not forget that people can be around people but still feel lonely.

The Old Party Group did some research into loneliness in the workplace and found that people can be in an office surrounded by others but still feel lonely.

Just thinking about the colleagues you work with, the friends you have, and your neighbours – it’s about looking out for each other. 

‘Reach out’

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People feeling lonely can get help as well. The first is to admit to yourself that you’re feeling lonely. And this is easy to say but harder to do.

Then tell someone about it. Reach out to someone and tell them how you’re feeling.

There are masses of opportunities to volunteer in this country, and that gives people the opportunity to get out of their home environment if that’s where they’re feeling particularly lonely.

It also allows them to mix with other people and at the same time contribute to our wider communities and society.

That gives them the dual benefits of not being on their own and feeling good about the contribution they’ve made as a volunteer.

There are lots of organisations like the British Red Cross offering advice on how to tackle it. 

One of the things we are keen to do is introduce a simple campaign which asks young people to do a little act of kindness.

If you see someone on their own, go over and speak to them, invite them for a coffee, or just have a drink with them.

It’s our Lift Someone Out of Loneliness campaign. Small acts of kindness can make a big difference.

The Rt Hon Stuart Andrew is the Conservative MP for Pudsey, and has been an MP continuously since 6 May 2010.

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