‘I went to the Queen’s “favourite shop” to see if I could afford anything’

Having only lived in London for just under six months, a lot of things are still alien to me. Coming from a small town in rural Scotland, where the tallest building is only around four storeys high, one of those enigmas is the world of department stores – while another is the people of the South’s obsession with the Royal Family.

From Harrods in Knightsbridge to Selfridge’s in Oxford Street, tourists can be spotted walking side by side with some of the capital’s richest socialites shopping for designer brands including Gucci, Dolce and Gobanna and Ralph Lauren. The closest I’ve ever got to owning any such luxury items is when I bought a knock-off “Rolex” watch while on holiday with my school mates in Kavos back in 2016.

READ MORE: ‘I went to Harrods with £10 to see if I could afford anything even remotely worth buying and was pleasantly surprised’

After reading that one department store, Fortnum and Mason’s, has long been a favourite with the Royal family, including Her Majesty The Queen, I decided to venture there myself to find if I could afford anything with just £10. After exploring every corner on all six floors, I was pleasantly surprised – but it came at a cost.

I truly had no idea what was in store for me, but after visiting the “Queen’s Grocer” straight after work donning my rucksack and £8 Primark waterproof jacket, one thing was for certain – I looked painfully out of place. My first thought upon entering was that I felt like I had been transported into Santa’s workshop.

Staff and customers alike were dressed to the nines, while some clients appeared to have their own personal shoppers showing them around some of the floors. With £10 in my pocket that I had been keeping aside for a rainy day, I headed over to the chocolate aisle, where I let out an audible gasp.

One singular Easter Egg – the same size as the £5 ones you can buy in Tesco or Asda – cost an eye-watering £100, while some boxes of chocolates, which looked similar to the ones you can pick up in Thorntons, cost as much as £150. Truffles priced at nearly £10 for just 100 grams caught my eye, and they looked delicious – coming in dozens of different flavours including Sicilian lemon and white chocolate Bellini.

I was surprised to find a huge display of fruit and veg on the ground floor, but nothing should have shocked me about this one-of-a-kind department store, which has been serving some of London’s richest citizens for 315 years. I quickly sniffed out the alcohol aisle but I was disappointed that I was unable to locate any Gordon’s Gin or Smirnoff Vodka. However, I did spy a £23,000 bottle of brandy, which I decided to leave on the shelf.

Upon reaching the First Floor after climbing a gorgeous spiral staircase, I was blown away by the intricately designed teapots, mugs and cutlery sets which exuded elegance. After hearing the words “excuse me Sir” coming from behing me, I swiftly turned around, forgetting that I had my rucksack on.

I am naturally clumsy, I fully admit that – but I can’t afford to be clumsy in a place like this. The whole table behind me shook and a £240 teapot wobbled at the edge of it. Had it fell over, I would have been looking at a rather expensive bill, which would have taken me straight into my overdraft.

On the higher up floors, you can find fragrances, home ware and hampers for all occasions, which Fortnum and Mason’s are famed for. The cheapest one I could find cost £72, but there were so many that I might have missed a bargain without realising it.

Although I could have bought some items for less than £10 that weren’t in the reduced section, they weren’t necessarily items that I would want or use (I’m talking £5 bottles of ketchup and mustard). It wasn’t until I found the reduced section by accident at the very end of my hour-long trip when I realised that I had hit the jackpot.

Nestled in the lower ground floor between the expensive marmalades and luxury jams, I managed to bag myself three items and still have change left of a tenner. Firstly, I grabbed Fortnum and Mason’s own brand medium-dark roast breakfast blend coffee, which was reduced to £1.75 from £3.50.

Then I also picked up a slab of white chocolate with hints of strawberry and black pepper for £3 – which was also half price. Finally, I grabbed a jar of olives reduced from £7 to £3.50, tallying up to a total of £8.25. I even had enough left over for my bus fare home, and still had a 10 pence coin to spare – without a doubt a successful trip all round.

There’s something for everyone at Fortnum and Mason’s – but mainly for people with a big budget and an expensive taste. From the store’s iconic hampers to 500 different varieties of chocolate, as well as tea, spices, and crockery, Fortnum and Mason’s is undoubtedly the place to be if you want to impress your dinner guests.

However, if you tried to do your weekly shop here, I am sure it would put most Londoners in debt. The layout of the store is as follows:

• Lower Ground Floor – Fresh Food Hall
• Ground Floor – Tea and Speciality Food
• First Floor – Homeware
• Second Floor – Fragrance, Beauty and Accessories
• Third Floor – Hamper
• Fourth Floor – Diamond Jubilee Tea Salon

A sign outside the store tells customers: “Food is our passion at and dining is our speciality. Travel can be a stressful affair but the truth is that many of our passengers find themselves frantically rushing at the airport just so they can spend a few hours luxuriating at our magnificent bar.

“As we prepare for this year’s Platinum Jubilee celebrations, we can hardly believe it has been 10 years since Her Majesty paid us a visit to open the new Diamond Jubilee tearoom, yet we hardly look a day older thanks to our delicious daily diet of laughter and tea.”

You can visit the Fortnum and Mason website here.

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