A grandma has been left disheartened when she agreed to look after her two grandchildren for the summer holidays, only to discover that her daughter had meticulously planned their days with various clubs and activities.
The devoted relative, who embarked on a six-hour journey from Cumbria to London, had envisioned spending quality time with her six and four-year-old grandchildren, enjoying leisurely picnics and memorable outings.
Little did she know that her daughter had different expectations in mind.
Seeking advice on the Mumsnet Am I Being Unreasonable? forum, the grandmother shared her dilemma. She explained a few months ago, her daughter had asked if she could babysit during the summer while she and her husband worked.
The grandmother agreed, planning to spend the first and last week of the holidays with her beloved grandchildren.
However, she had assumed these two weeks would be relaxed and flexible, allowing her and her husband to decide how they would spend their time together.
To her surprise, her daughter informed her that the children were booked into a tennis club from 9am to 12pm every morning for both weeks.
Additionally, the godparents would pick them up on Wednesdays to play with their older children.
She said: “Now I’m driving over six hours to spend afternoons with the grandkids, probably too tired to go out and do anything. I don’t enjoy living to a schedule, that’s why I retired early!!
“I told my daughter I wasn’t much happy and she said, if the issue is the being up and ready to go early, she or her husband will drop them off before they start work but they would need help for the Wednesday morning.
“I told her the issue is I’m coming down to spend time with my grandkids and rather than spending time with them I’ll be doing club runs and dealing with tired kids in the afternoon. She has replied saying if I am unhappy we can not bother coming down, but the kids want to do the clubs and it will be better for them.
“I’m not disagreeing the kids doing clubs is great, but why on the weeks I’ll be looking after them? Why not consult me??”
The post garnered hundreds of responses, with opinions divided on who was in the wrong. Some felt the grandmother was being unreasonable, suggesting the daughter may have thought she was helping by providing a regular morning activity for the children.
One person wrote: “I think you’re being unreasonably prescriptive…two weeks with two young children is quite full on. In your shoes I’d be pleased they had a regular morning activity. I imagine your daughter thought she was helping you out.”
Others empathised with the grandmother’s frustration, saying her daughter should have consulted her before finalising the plans.
One person said: “I suspect she booked it thinking she was doing you a favour. Having two young kids all day is hard work, and she will know how hard hers are better then anyone. She probably thought she was doing a nice thing by taking the pressure off you.”
Another user saw things on the same side as the grandma and commented: “I completely agree with you. She should have asked you what you wanted. If she’s using you for free childcare then you should be consulted.”
With another adding: “Daughter probably trying to be helpful but she should have discussed with you before making arrangements! I as a Grandma enjoy taking my grandchild out on proper day trips rather than just killing a couple of hours in the afternoon.”
This article was crafted with the help of AI tools, which speed up Express.co.uk’s editorial research. A news editor reviewed this content before it was published. You can report any errors to [email protected].
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