I drove the Abarth 500e – it’s comfy and plush but has an embarrassing feature

TIMES have changed. In my day, we cut big Kenwood speakers into the parcel shelf of our XR2s.

Yep, I’m an Eighties kid.

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Now Abarth has put a giant waterproof speaker UNDER the back of a 500e.

Why?

Because engineers wanted to mimic the noise of a petrol-powered 695 from an otherwise silent electric car.

They shouldn’t have bothered.

If you haven’t heard a 695 before, it sounds like Optimus Prime clearing his throat. All deep and rumbly and excellent.

This 500e whirrs like a food mixer when you accelerate. Honestly, I saw people point and laugh as we drove past. It was embarrassing.

Drag-race button

Even worse, you have to stop the car and go through four sub-menus on the driver’s cluster in order to switch it off.

Why not just pipe the sound into the cabin speakers if that’s what customers really want?

Because the only external speakers the rest of us get excited about are on an ice cream van.

I have other complaints too.

It’ll only do 150 miles before you need to stop and recharge.

But you’d happily go further because it’s so plush and comfy.

In a 695, you’ll want to stop after 150 miles because it’s so stiff and raw and uncomfortable and exhausting. And your ears are bleeding.

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What I’m trying to say is, an Abarth is supposed to be the nutty Asbo half-brother of a regular Fiat 500.

This feels like a trim level. I think Abarth knows it too. Which is why this car costs no more than a posh 500 La Prima by Bocelli.

Surely there’s a proper bad-ass version to follow? There has to be.

On the upside, the regular 500e is the best small electric car on sale today. So Abarth had a good starting point.

The regular 500e drives sweetly, looks class inside and out, uses the same touchscreen as a Maserati MC20, and has a cabrio option.

So what has Abarth done exactly?

The e-motor has been hiked from 118hp to 152hp. The suspension and steering have been tuned slightly. They’ve added rear disc brakes and wider tyres and stuck A B A R T H in big letters on the nose and rump.

It’s not quick, but it’s nippy, smooth and nicely balanced, which makes pinballing from A to B fun and easy. Just as it is in a regular 500e.

Except a regular 500e will go further between charges.

You’re also getting Abarth’s acid green paint job, a drag-race button on the touchscreen to record acceleration times, and that stupid speaker.

All things I can live without.

But it turns out this car isn’t for an Eighties kid anyway.

The marketing bod told me: “We are moving to a new type of customer. From piston heads to gamers, and also to more premium customers.”

Fine. Let them have it.

I much prefer a regular 500e.

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