While swiping away on dating apps with a massive tub of Haggen-Daz in your favourite jammies may be more relaxing than working up a sweat on the treadmill, for dating potentials, Tiktok is awash with #gymcrush stories.
With a staggering 5.7 billion views and counting, this trend reflects quite literally getting off the couch to find a potential love interest at your local gym.
But – and there’s a big but – approaching someone in this environment is very easy to get wrong. We’ve all heard stories of women being sexually harassed at the gym, so you don’t want to add to those numbers, or do the exact same thing in reverse.
So, is it even okay to be approaching the person you fancy who’s working on the weights? Dating expert Andrea Balboni, from Zoe Clews Associates therapy clinic, believes so.
She thinks there should be a balance of confidence and respect, and that it’s all about reading the signals, whether it’s pre or post-workout.
Approaching #gymcrush
Of course, when approaching someone new no one wants to startle someone or come across as a creep, but Andrea recommends simply having a little fun with it.
‘When seeing a potential partner, it’s important to work it slowly, good things can take time. Start with an open smile and build it up slowly, make eye contact, smile and then move on,’ she says.
‘After this, the next time you see them perhaps this can be followed with a casual ‘hi’ and then after that a quick question or, ‘How’s the workout going?’
‘See where the conversation leads. If they take the bait, stay open to it. And if not, don’t dismay, new people are always joining gyms all the time.’
She also adds a funny tip if you get butterflies.
‘A great hack when nervous about approaching someone is to say to yourself (silently, in your head!) ‘I’m sexy I can’t stop smiling’ It’s pretty impossible to do it without automatically smiling and it instantly reduces anxiety and helps you take yourself less seriously. Just remember not to say it out loud!’
Lose the anti-social headphones
While headphones go hand in hand with a workout, Andrea says that it’s important to keep yourself open to meeting someone.
‘Pumping to your fave beats may keep you in the ‘flow’ but those headphones are basically saying, ‘Don’t talk to me, I’m in full-on concentration mode.’
‘It doesn’t have to be every time, but try losing them for a few workouts. It’ll help you get out of your silent workout mode and into “social interactions, here I come” vibe.’
Don’t over concentrate
Just like the headphones sometimes less is more. Andrea says there’s something called “the full concentration mode stare” and that relaxing it will help you reap the benefits.
‘Some people may be disciplined about getting the most out of their workouts, but the determined ‘nothing’s going to stop me’ stare won’t be exactly inviting someone in,’ she says.
‘Remember to break out of full zone mode and drop into a lighter ‘flow’ every once in a while. It’ll be good for your body to get a breather too.’
Have fun with it
Andrea shares that while this isn’t a sure-fire ticket, dressing in bright colours can help, particularly if you want to feel good too.
‘Red especially is known to attract people in. It’s a strong, bold colour and can help you feel powerful as you’re about to do something that can feel quite scary when the endorphins haven’t quite kicked in yet.
‘When the endorphins do kick in, ride the wave of bliss and bank in on that positive feeling by sharing the vibes with your crush.’
‘You’ll smile wider, laugh and the easy-goingness of it all will relax your crush too.’
This is exactly what happened to Enas Daeki, from London, who found her #gymcrush while having a workout.
‘One day, a guy waited for me before I left the gym, and as we started walking together to the train station we began chatting. This led to an invitation for coffee the next day. We continued to meet at the gym for months, and it turned into a meaningful relationship.’
We love an inspo story.
You heard it here first, you can approach your gym crush, just remember not to comment on their appearance or stare, read the social cues if they want to be left alone, and most importantly: keep it 100% non-creepy.
MORE: Kanye West and ‘wife’ Bianca Censori pensive as they hit gym together in Los Angeles
MORE: This TikTok workout hack could be a game changer for your gymtimidation
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