You’re sat alone on your lunch break, swiping through endless unsuitable matches, when you look up, and the friendly guy from your office gives you a smile.
For a second you wonder: ‘Could he be The One?’
But then you look around and realise that, between the stream of fish pics on the apps, and the middle-aged business men in your office, he’s the only guy in your age bracket for miles around.
And then, the question must be asked: ‘Do you fancy him? Or is he just convenient?’
The same scenario can be applied to that gym bro who always wants to use the squat rack at the same time as you, or basically anybody of an appropriate age sitting near you on a flight.
You’ve found yourself a ‘proximity crush’ – a potential partner who doesn’t really excite you, but who is simply there, and able to offer you a relationship.
Sounds harmless enough, but as Match’s dating expert, Hayley Quinn says, ‘this may mean you end up settling for a relationship of convenience because you’ve grown tired of being single.’
Hayley tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Being single isn’t always easy: you may find yourself judged for your single status, stressing about who to invite as a plus one to your friend’s wedding, or lonely on the weekends if all your friends are coupled up.
‘This can push you to make decisions with dating that you wouldn’t normally make, such as dating people that don’t particularly treat you well, or entering into relationships of convenience because you don’t feel content by yourself.’
It’s a phenomenon that’s made it’s way to TikTok, with creators sharing videos asking whether the person they’re crushing on really is cute – or just convenient.
So how do you make sure you’re choosing your relationships for the right reason?
‘Work first on your self-love and self-esteem before jumping to the first potential partner you meet,’ explains Hayley.
‘That might mean that you focus on building up your social life, taking on a passion project, or letting go of any self-imposed deadlines for when you have to meet someone.’
But she warns, even your perfect match might not tick all your boxes.
‘No relationship is perfect,’ she says. ‘All will involve some degree of compromise. It’s wise to date out of your normal type and focus on the positives of people you meet.
‘Just make sure your open minded attitude is balanced by also having a healthy respect for your own standards.’
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