Dannii Minogue: ‘I Kissed a Boy isn’t a gay Love Island – but we do need one’
Dannii Minogue is the pop princess turned TV judge who is now about to become the ultimate dating guru for gay men everywhere in her new show I Kissed A Boy.
And no, this isn’t a gay Love Island.
Here, the singer talks breaking boundaries with her LGBTQ dating show, the circus of X Factor and we ask why are the Minogues the ultimate gay icons?
So your new show I Kissed A Boy, there’s a lot of snogging and there’s a lot of boys, but there’s so much heart and a lot to learn in there too.
Yeah, the kiss is just the beginning and then there’s the conversations that happen after that, for sure. For me, that’s what is so interesting. I guess the first question I get asked by anyone is, ‘is this gay love Ireland?’ No, not really. But there for sure should be a gay Love Island.
This should open the space for every kind of gay dating show. This isn’t that, this is really about the heart and soul of people looking for love, which I know from friends of mine in the community, they’re like, ‘Oh, I’m sick of dating and swiping and, I just wanted to find someone!’
So I just thought why not come to a show where it’s at a team of people that absolutely want that for you as well. Sometimes you live in a town and you’re like, ‘Okay, I know everyone in this town so, how would I meet someone?’
I mean, I live in London, and I’ve definitely felt like that.
Yeah! Even in the city as a straight girl like me, when I used to watch Sex in the City, I felt like ‘it’s never going to happen! It happens. I guess we get more and more neurotic. We’ve all got, I guess an expectation in our head, ‘I’m going to settle down at this age’ and when it doesn’t coincide with that, it’s so frustrating.
How does it feel presenting a show that really will be so monumental for a lot of people?
Yeah, this is going to change the daily life paths of many, many people. There’s so much to be learned from the show, for families, friends and allies, and even for people who attack the community. I think they’re attacking something they don’t know about, or they feel like they’ve never met anyone that’s gay.
I think the show’s an education of how different all the guys are that are in there, their lifestyles are so different, there’s not one kind of person and I think that’s real credit to the show. People get down to nitty gritty with conversation, I love it.
I’m so happy that BBC Three is kicking the door down, putting the show out there because it’s nuts that it’s 2023 and this has never happened before.
You touched on it there that the cast is made up of so many different types of guys – was that important to you before you signed up?
Yeah, I had a million questions for production before I would sign up to be a part of it is because yes, I want to be involved in the first show of this kind but it had to be the right show, it had to align with my thought process.
Who’s going to be on it? How would they be looked after? It was amazing.
Most of the crew is from the community, the boys felt really supported. It was just a relaxed environment. You don’t have to be anything else than you are. I wouldn’t have signed up for anything if I went home at night and thought I can’t sleep because I don’t know how this is going to roll out or I don’t know how that person is going to feel.
I had a meeting with the psychiatrist that was involved in the casting and was with us on set the entire time who specialises in the LGBTQ community.
Even then, I wanted to interview him! ‘Yes, but is this right?!’ But he was incredible. We were in tears after the last episode was filmed. I went to find him and we just cuddled and we were in tears.
Do you hope that something like Love Island takes note and sees that it’s generally better viewing even to have a relatable cast?
I think it’s important to have something like this where there are real conversations going on. But I think there should be space for all sorts of shows, because I have friends that love the Love Island, love all of the six packs and all that. I think there should be space for everything.
How do you think that kiss changes the dynamic? I feel like they seem way more less inhibited immediately.
Yeah, you see them before the kiss asking, “What have I got myself into – this is nuts!” And they’re trying to trust the process but this isn’t just random that person has been chosen in the hope that you both are really into each other.
There’s way more chance of making a connection than swiping and clicking on someone.
After that first kiss, they just let everything wash away. They just get to know each other as it should be. It’s just normal, like being in a club, seeing someone you’re attracted to and maybe have a kiss or dance
That stuff happens naturally just this time it’s in full broad daylight with cameras rolling! It’s amazing how they just let that go and then really focused on the other guys misery there. I mean, there are worse places to be!
There was a point when you were downstairs in a green dress and you meet the boys when for a moment I generally thought I was watching judges’ houses again.
Yes! It was very much Ibiza with the boys.
What role would you say that you play in this between gay icon, friend, and then the mother figure to the to the boys?
The boys call me Mama Minogue. I’m kind of like a fairy godmother, I arrived in these couture outfits that are just wild and I’ve got to serve this fashion – they’re expecting it.
It definitely takes them a while to get used to me. Each time I would be on set they’d loosen up and realise I’m just a person. I definitely love being a mom, love being maternal. I don’t take any s**t from anyone either.
It’s tough love, but when they’re having conversations in front of me, they’re very aware of what they’re saying – kind of shocked sometimes to go, “Oh, my God, I just said that front of Dannii Minogue!”
So as it goes on, you get stuck into the politics then?
I come in and we’ll set some kind of a challenge for them to get to know each other a bit better. So obviously, not every single thing can end up in edit but I hear everything. So each time I have a challenge with them, I learned so much about them. I can then kind of see where things going.
And how was it playing that mother figure as opposed to being a TV judge on X Factor?
It was nice, I like it so much. Definitely, in the pitch, it was some kind of Cupid Fairy Godmother coming in, I’m like, “oh, check!” To be a part of something that is just going to make history is incredible. As I say, there’s a lot of nerves because we’ve got to do this right.
There’s so much pressure on our shoulders, whoever does this first has to do it right.
I think the best decision was we’re making this for the community, not for anyone else. Anyone else is welcome to watch but this is we’re making that call that we’re making up for the gay guys who have been asking for years and years and years. Why don’t we have a dating show?
Have you ever been approached to do something like this before?
No, it’s never come up, which is, again, mind blowing. I think there’ll be so many producers and people who work in TV will be sitting at home watching it going, ‘God I’ve been wanting to do this forever.’
BBC Three really actioning it after the success that they’ve had with RuPaul’s Drag Race, created an environment where it just showed who was out there and who wants to watch different TV shows and I feel like that rolled out a red carpet for this to happen.
The X Factor was so big and such a circus. I’m sure it was fun but I can imagine it was also incredibly difficult in parts so were you ever hesitant to come back to television at all?
It was a different time, a different era, a different space back then. It was the very beginning of social media. There’s a lot going on, and half the country was watching so yeah it was a lot of pressure.
I knew I’m not walking back into that same show and times have moved on. What I am excited about this is being able to read the comments to really interact through social media.
Obviously, you are a gay icon, when did it dawn on you that that’s a really massive part of your of public career and how much that means to the LGBT community.
I mean, it’s not something you go, “Oh, I’m the gay icon today,” but people come up to me, or messaging me with something that I’ve done that meant something to them personally.
Going on, and doing a show, whether it’s like, you know, popping up at Royal Albert Hall with Kylie, I hearing those screams, and then all the messages that flood in after that , it’s just the stories that people tell you that it means something, saying they listened to a record of mine which help them through a time or when they’re shaping their identity and navigating life.
It’s so incredible that a record can have that comfort in it.
And then whenever you hear that song forevermore, that means something whether people have told me that was their first kiss, or that we played that at our wedding, I’ve heard everything. That’s when you know, you’re a part of the fabric. You’re welcome, you’re loved. That’s amazing.
But for me when I think about gay icons I’m thinking Cher, I’m thinking Dolly – I do not think of myself as that.
You absolutely are a gay icon.
I agree to put on a on a frock! But the best parties are the gay clubs for me, Prides and Mardi Gras. That for me is like where I feel very comfortable very safe.
Seeing the pictures of you and Kylie performing together at Pride recently, I was painfully jealous of everyone there. What is it about the Minogue sisters that makes them the epitome of gay icons?
We can’t even put a finger on it, we can’t explain it but we we’re on stage we feel this energy between us and we feel the energy between us and the audience.
Even the photo of us on stage, you look at it and its holding so much emotion and I was just all of the weeks leading up to it I was just thinking I just want to get on stage and just you know be with the most open heart and just be enjoying every second I don’t want to like I don’t want to blink that’s how I felt.
I had friends who said Harry Styles is playing, big pop concerts were happening so they couldn’t get to World Pride because it sold out really quickly.
They couldn’t get flights, it was intense.
There phone was going ping ping ping! They thought it was like someone’s dead or something’s happened and then they saw the picture.
What time would that have been for you?
I think I woke up to it and just devastated that I wasn’t in Sydney.
The whole city was alive then flows into Sydney Harbour Bridge. I don’t know if you’ve watched any of that but everyone marching across the bridge and share emotional stories, people walking with their parents, their friends, their supporters.
Especially at the moment, the conversation from anti-trans and anti LGBTQ+ voices feels so much louder than ours right now.
Mardi Gras is the big parade through the street, drag queens parading through the street, there’s more drag queens than you’ve ever seen!
Exactly, this show coming out now at this time, it holds a bigger significance even doesn’t it?
Well, I kind of believe in fate and synchronicity, of course. We would have all have wanted this a lot earlier, it’s been a long wait. But who knows? Maybe we’ll look back on this and think that was the right timing.
But it would be incredible to have this conversation a year on from now. I don’t think any of us can predict what’s going to happen.
Finally, how do you feel about your new role, as every gay man’s dating guru?
Oh my god, yes! I’d love nothing more than that. Let me at it. Bring it on!
We’re here, we’re queer – get used to it, right?
I Kissed A Boy launches today on BBC Three.
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