Zoe Lyons talks getting into exercise in her forties and dealing with alopecia

Comedian Zoe Lyons has appeared on TV shows including Mock The Week and presented her own game show, Lightning. She won Funny Women in 2004 and is currently on touring the UK with her latest show, Bald Ambition.

Do you get your five a day?

Not every day, I spread it out over the week, so some days I might get 10 and other days less. I love a bit of broccoli. I’ll cook a steak and have three different types of vegetables. I’m not a massive fan of green juice or smoothies – I did a juice cleanse last year and I only lasted three days.

Have you broken any bones?

I broke my arm as a child falling off a skateboard. I broke my nose falling out of a taxi – it was one of those nights when you’ve had a great night and you go home and the top half of your body leaves the taxi and your legs stay inside it. I face planted straight into the pavement.

My nose is wonky now. And I broke my shoulder last year in a skiing accident. I’ve been skiing since I was ten and I’ve never had an accident before. I hit a lump of hard snow and went flying. Thankfully I didn’t need to have an operation. It was in a sling for five weeks and took eight months in total to heal. It’s alright now but it will always be a bit weaker.

How often do you exceed NHS drinking guidelines?

More often than I should. It used to be 21 units for men and 14 for women but now it’s 14 for everyone but they’re saying even that’s too much. I’m old school though, I like a glass of wine. I think younger people pay attention to those guidelines but maybe that’s to do with the cost of living. My age category thinks ‘Eff it, I’ve made it this far.’ Some people stopped drinking altogether during lockdown but I went a bit Leaving Las Vegas with an 11.30am rum in the garden.

Have you ever Googled any symptoms?

Constantly – I had a pain in my neck the other day so I started Googling ‘thyroid problems’ but it’s probably because of how I slept. I’ve got alopecia so I’ve done a lot of Googling about that. There’s a lot of quackery out there – ‘put onion juice on your head.’ I thought ‘Really? That doesn’t sound very advisable.’

I’ve looked at a lot of medical research papers online. They’re quite boring, I lose interest, so I skip to the end where it usually says something like ’14% of people have a positive outcome.’ What I learned is that there’s no proper treatment other than improving your lifestyle generally and hoping that helps with the hair growth.

How long have you had it?

I had it when I was 10, I lost a third of my hair then, and I lost patches in my twenties. It’s an auto immune disease but my alopecia has always been triggered by stress. It started again three years ago and I lost 80% of my hair. It fell out in patches, some would grow back, then other bits would fall out. Thankfully it’s started to grow back now. I’m happy to see the new hair come through.

Do you exercise regularly?

I came to exercise in my forties. I was doing a corporate gig, I was wearing a suit I’d worn before and I couldn’t get up the stairs as the trousers were too tight, then I caught sight of myself in a mirror. I thought ‘God, I’ve piled it on.’ So that had to stop.

Now I do Cross Fit twice a week, a movement class once a week which involves a lot of stretching and I run for six miles three times a week. There’s weight lifting involved in Cross Fit which is important for women my age as it staves off bad backs and bad knees. I love it. I get really tetchy now if I can’t exercise.

How do you look after your mental health?

The exercise really helps with that. I live in Brighton and I like going out in nature, walking along the coast, getting in the sea – being outside helps as well.

And I’ve started taking regular holidays. When you are first starting out as a comic there’s this fear that if you take any time off you’ll be forgotten and if you say no to something you will never be offered anything again. When you get to my age you realise there’s no truth in 
that whatsoever.

Where was your last holiday?

I’ve just come back from Mexico. I went diving with schools of sharks off the coast – diving with hammerheads, bull sharks, tiger sharks – it was a life-changing experience. It was utterly amazing. It’s heightened my existing outlook on life which is there is only now, get on with it and do it. It was immense and it was beautiful.

Zoe plays Halifax’s Square Chapel tomorrow, and touring

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