Woman branded ‘ungrateful’ for wanting to return engagement ring

A fiancée has left the internet divided after sharing her disappointment at her engagement ring – and asking whether she should exchange it.

Just what is her issue with the ring? It’s not the style, but the size of the stone.

Taking to Mumsnet, the unnamed woman asked for advice, acknowledging that she’ll probably ‘get flamed for this and likely ripped to shreds’.

‘My partner proposed to me on holiday, which was great and very sweet,’ she wrote.

‘We are both not the most socially outgoing types, and he’s quite uncomfortable with all the attention this news will bring, so I haven’t told a soul yet. I said yes, obviously.

‘We were in a country with a high crime rate, so he had a temporary dummy ring for that, and also because my actual ring hadn’t arrived yet.

‘It came yesterday, and it’s exactly the style I’d liked but the diamond is so tiny it’s just lost on my hand.’

She went on to say that she ‘didn’t want to be ungrateful’ since the groom tried his best, selecting something from Tiffany and getting the style right to boot.

‘That may have a part to play as I know they mark up prices for everything,’ she added.

‘Anyway, the diamond is a 0.22 carat and while it is very, very sparkly it is so, so small it’s barely noticeable.

‘Do I just keep quiet about this even though I don’t totally love it, or do I be hones? I’d be willing to pay for the difference to say change to a 0.5-carat diamond instead but don’t want to offend him by suggesting this.

‘I’m not after some big 2-carat ring or something. I assume the platinum band itself was pricey. I’ve no idea how much it cost, and I know I don’t need to know that, I don’t know if upgrading the diamond by half a carat is going to be unreasonable either.

‘What would you do here? Do I just wear it regardless, or should I be honest and try not to offend him while I do?’

People in the comments are divided, with some accusing her of sounding ‘ungrateful’, but others advised her to just be honest with him.

One person wrote: ‘I also have an engagement ring I wouldn’t have chosen, but I love it because DH cared enough to choose it for me.

‘If you hated the style I think you might be able to say something without hurting him, but I can’t imagine a way of wording “the diamond you bought me is too small” that comes across well.’

Another commenter agreed, saying: ‘Yeah that’s the thing. The size of the diamond is what’s bugging you and yeah that does sound ungrateful tbh.

‘Unless, as I suggest, you offer to swap for a much cheaper stone.’

However, a different person argued: ‘Most people will say you are being ungrateful and you should accept what is offered.

‘I say, you are the one who has to wear it/look at it on a daily basis, so if it’s not your thing speak up. Get what you want.’

To which the poster replied: ‘Thank you, this is why I’m wondering if I pay for it, it might help.’

But what makes a good engagement ring? Does size matter?

When it comes to cost, London jeweller Emma Clarkson Webb previously told us there’s no set number people should be aiming for.

‘Obviously,’ she said, ‘be sensible and don’t bankrupt yourself. Remember that size doesn’t always matter.

‘You can buy something incredibly unique by opting for smaller stones or a diamond alternative – sapphires, tsavorites, and tourmalines all make incredibly striking centre stones.’

What do you think? Let us know in the comments below…

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing MetroLifestyleTeam@Metro.co.uk.

MORE : Mum praised for response after aunt told her to stop breastfeeding in public

MORE : Man rages at brother over ‘ironic’ new tattoo: ‘He’s acting like a child’

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.