ABBA proves they’re better than Lady Gaga, Madonna on ‘Voyage’

Gimme gimme gimme a new ABBA album after midnight! 

By 12:01 a.m. Friday I was already gobbling up “Voyage,” the Swedish pop group’s first original tracks since they split up nearly 40 years ago, and was immediately awed: The music sounds just like their classic hits. 

How can this possibly be? Did they make a deal with the Norse goddess of the underworld?

Instantly “Voyage” transported me to a St-Tropez discotheque in 1979. It was unbelievable and discombobulating. Confused, I decided to switch to drinking water. But hours later, in the light of day, the effect was the same — ABBA is back.

Like in the group’s heyday, the 10 toe-tappers seem simple, but are actually devilishly complex with many layers and parts, like an IKEA sofa. Anni-Frid Lyngstad and Agnetha Fältskog, both over 70 now, are vocally 25 and harmonize sumptuously as ever. 

Björn Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson continue to write about messy lovers’ quarrels as though “Knowing Me, Knowing You” has been replaying in their heads on a constant loop for decades. 

It’s ingenious. The critics have been loving “Voyage” and are writing about this unicorn of albums — how often does a hugely famous band reunite and make actual quality music? — with the same enthusiasm as the new music from Adele. The freakishly catchy “Don’t Shut Me Down” should be required playing on all dance floors worldwide.

There are lessons from good ol’ ABBA for the desperate pop stars of today.

Craving to stay relevant, major singers such as Lady Gaga, Madonna, Taylor Swift and Nick Jonas adapt to every tiny fluctuation in society by completely remaking their personalities. It’s a bit sad, really.

Take how quickly the Jonas brother went from wearing a purity ring to pandering to gay fans with man-on-man make-out sessions on TV and endless ab pics on Instagram.

Or the way Madonna started out inspiring Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears and moved to copying their outfits and musical styles to be hip. (And, you know, kissing them on live TV.)

Superstar Swift manufactured a false-feeling “dark” persona with “Reputation” because she thought the sweet high school Taylor of her first records — still her best — wasn’t what people wanted anymore.

And Gaga, who has transitioned to an Oscar-nominated actress and occasional singer of jazz standards, has all but given her dance-pop days the old heave ho. “Chromatica” flirted with the past, but was far from “The Fame Monster.”

ABBA, in stark contrast, hates all change. Why fix what isn’t broken? The band never embraced the sexuality of disco in the 1970s or the shrill edge of the ’80s. Their sound is totally unique, an oasis of tunes you can’t find anywhere else. Sure, they’ve made a humongous impact on music, but they are damn near impossible to copy.

In never trying to adapt to changing times, ABBA has become timeless. “Dancing Queen,” “Super Trouper” and “Mamma Mia” are cross-generational classics you could hear at a 23-year-old’s wedding tomorrow. Can the same be said about any Beatles songs?

As they sing in their first major hit, “Waterloo,” “the history book on the shelf is always repeating itself!” In the case of ABBA, thank God for that.